Due Date Discouragement

Today is June 27, the day that our girls were due to be born.  Belladia continues to do very well – she looks like a full-term baby and is feeding and growing well.  We’re thankful for how well she is.

Gloriana continues in the hospital.  At last check, she was 4 lbs, 5.5 ounces.  Sadly, she continues to have Brady’s – she had them on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday.  Yesterday I heard a bit more discouraging news.  Although her recent echocardiogram looked good, her chest x-ray wasn’t as positive; the doctors saw some fluid on her lungs.  They figure that this is a result of the VSD (hole in her heart), so they are trying to remedy the fluid with medication.  The hospital is giving her Lasix, which is a diuretic.  They hope that the medication will clear up that fluid and also prevent fluid from building up on her lungs in the future.  The nurse practitioner said that we should figure on her staying on the medication until either the hole in her heart closes on its own or she has surgery to repair the hole in her heart.  I asked if having fluid on her lungs was reason enough to think about having surgery soon, and the nurse practitioner said no.

However, the fact that she’s not putting on as much weight as she should might be cause for surgery.

Gloriana should be putting on about 25-30 grams per day; she’s not.  Until she puts on 25-30 grams per day for 3-4 days in a row, she’s not allowed to come home.  So even if she outgrows the Brady’s and is doing well on that front, she won’t come home unless she’s also putting on weight.

While I don’t want surgery per se, I DO want whatever’s best for Gloriana to really thrive.  So I asked – again – whether not putting on weight was reason to think about surgery soon.  She said that if this continues – if she continues to struggle putting on the weight that she should – then they would have to consider whether Gloriana is showing signs of “failure to thrive.”  If that were the case (and it’s NOT right now), then they would have to think seriously about surgery to repair the VSD.  The only trouble?  The surgery is much more safe when a baby is bigger; the doctors would prefer to do the surgery when a baby weighs more.

You probably see where this is going: on the one hand, she may need surgery because she’s not putting on weight; on the other hand, she may not be able to have surgery because she’s not putting on weight.  [Sigh]  You can see after six weeks (tomorrow) of hospitalization why we’re starting to feel discouraged.  I asked yesterday if we were still on track (after the recent Brady’s) to have Gloriana come home on Wednesday; the nurse practitioner looked at the nurse, then looked at me, then said, “Well, she needs to put on gobs of weight before then if that were to happen.”  She didn’t sound hopeful.

So we wait and pray.  We pray the Brady’s will stop.  We pray the increased weight gain will start.  We pray that Bella’s check-up with the cardiologist tomorrow will go well.  We pray that we’ll have patience to get through this season.  On the one hand, we want to cry our eyes out, yet we have to be strong for the girls, our two other kids, and each other.

It’ll be good to have everyone home.  In the meantime – and all the time – God is good.

~Jeff